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Friend vs. Ministry? - 12/1/2008 7:13:19 PM
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solomonsprayer
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I saw deermousie's comment from another post that the differene between a friend and a ministry is that a friend shares common interests and gives back mutually to you. A ministry is someone who has a need and only takes, but does not give.
Is this true for you? Are there other types of relationships or ways of looking at the differences here?
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RE: Friend vs. Ministry? - 12/6/2008 2:40:34 PM
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Rozcraft
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I have heard of situations: maybe at work when a person who you either would never cross paths with or not have many common interests with. And yet God may whisper, "Sit and talk with her/him." "Sit and listen to her/him." Or, "Say Hi intentionally to him/her." Maybe you have been through something that will be a blessing to that person. Maybe that's the whole point of why you went through something 5 years ago for this particular time.
Now, you never sacrafice violating your conscience or sinning with that person. Example, if a co-worker likes to go to a strip club on Friday nights to unwind. Don't think, "Oh this is my opportunity to talk to him about Jesus." "I'll go on his turf. IF a friend's turf means that you will violate scripture for the sake of "ministry", then this isn't right. In time, if a person really needs you, God can create another opportunity.
I think in your attempt to minister, you can be ministered back to. It doesn't mean that YOU get to do ALL the giving and the other person gets to do ALL the taking. I have heard people visit the sick in the hospital to minister and end up leaving the hospital ministered to and encouraged by that sick person. A friendship, to me is more intimate where there is mutal sharing. It is not always the case in ministering. Sometimes the best thing we can do to minister to family and friends is to learn to be a good listener.
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RE: Friend vs. Ministry? - 12/6/2008 10:16:54 PM
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deermousie
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Good point, Solomonsprayer.
My question was pretty narrow to apply only to one situation, but I think you guys are right that it's not a black and white deal. Especially in marriage it seems like we take turns taking care of one another, and it's a pretty complex relationship. So why wouldn't non-marriages also be complex? I'm glad you brought this up.
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RE: Friend vs. Ministry? - 12/7/2008 9:31:24 PM
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solomonsprayer
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quote:
ORIGINAL: deermousie
Good point, Solomonsprayer.
My question was pretty narrow to apply only to one situation, but I think you guys are right that it's not a black and white deal. Especially in marriage it seems like we take turns taking care of one another, and it's a pretty complex relationship. So why wouldn't non-marriages also be complex? I'm glad you brought this up.
I don't know though mousie.
I actually took to your logic the more I thought about it.
I can see that either a person is friend material (someone who you can mutually respect and trust and share things with) or they are not (at least, not yet). I suppose for those who are not friends, they can maybe fall into more groups, such as acquaintence, ministry/charity, or someone to be avoided at all costs (like a wolf in sheeps skin type of Christian - someone who professes Christian faith, but acts and thinks consistently contradictory to it).
So to me there is either friend or non-friend. And the non-friend has many categories, which includes ministry/charity case. I guess that IS different from your original comment about a black and white situation of friend vs. ministry. Though in that comment, you were referring to a particular situation and not everyone/everything.
I think we can also minister and be ministered to by various people and so the issue of ministry is not relevant with friendship or not. So for me, I think the best way to see it is still the breakdown above.
Friend or non-friend. 
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RE: Friend vs. Ministry? - 12/8/2008 6:29:28 AM
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anna5686
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Is it necessary to make such distinctions? The particular ministry in which I am involved reaches out to Internationals. These wonderful people love the help they receive, but it is by no means a one way street. We receive at least as much in return as we could possibly give. Ministry, yes. But also wonderful friends. The dividing line? We don't pay any attention to that.
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I have many different types of relationships/friends, some of whom give back abundantly, some who I rarely see, but who always welcome me whenever I do see them, some I constantly disagree with, some I only know in passing, some who I love deeply, etc... but I call them all friends.
